I have something to confess.
Working with some women annoys me to no end. I absolutely cannot handle that catty, backstabbing, two-faced behavior that immature, insecure or threatened women display. I can’t and I’m not apologizing for it.
We’ve seen this discussion before from fellow Woman of HR, Laurie Ruettimann, who wrote about women’s behavior in the workplace. For the most part, we do stick together – at least around here. But in every team there’s the one person that feels threatened or is less confident than she’d like. From my perspective that woman has a choice to make: Do I deal with these feelings by myself and work through them like an adult or do I take it out, intentional or not, on the person I’m threatened by?
Directing feelings of insecurity at the person that makes you feel that way doesn’t help the situation. Yes, you may feel vindicated for about five minutes when you get to cc: the boss on a perceived mistake or prove the person wrong in a meeting – but that doesn’t help in the long run.
Here’s my advice on what does help: talk to the person that makes you feel this way. Maybe that person doesn’t even know they are doing something to bother you. Maybe you’ll find that you like the person and can learn from them. Or, maybe your fears are confirmed and the person is a crazy bat out to get you and you make plans for a cat fight in the back parking lot at 5:15 p.m. sharp. Who knows? What can it hurt to talk out your problems like civilized professional adults?
For the most part, I love working with my fellow professional women. It can be a strong and empowering team. But it only takes one threatened or insecure team member for that strong force to come crashing down.
Don’t be that one.
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