The Secret World Of Rules
Several years ago, I read the 2005 commencement speech David Foster Wallace gave at Kenyon College. It is a profound piece that challenges me to look beyond the immediate, the obvious, and the hidden-in-plain-sight.
I reread it frequently.
6 Responses to “The Secret World Of Rules”
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[...] The Secret World Of Rules Being direct has its advantages, too. “There is a long list of invisible, but expected, [...]
John Jorgensen says: I’ve had similar problems with lack of direction or instructions at those self service lanes. No directions that you can’t use coupons, it won’t take magazines, no alcohol, no marked down merchandise….with no signs that they can’t be done there. I understand the principle and business decision behind those lanes but without clear instructions they are more of a hinderance that an aid. Good lession for all organizaitons to think of.
Deirdre, This is a great thing to point out. Having been a rule-follower all my life, I know I dislike having that feeling of ‘breaking the rules’ when in fact I didn’t actually know the rule! At my old office, we had a large refrigerator in the cafeteria with milk/creamer for coffee and lots of juice and soft drinks. When I was given my office tour, someone pointed to the fridge and said “The stuff in there is free.” I thought she meant everything, so I frequently went to the fridge, and grabbed soft drinks or juice and left without paying. Turns out, only the milk/creamer were free…we were supposed to be paying for the juice or soft drinks. When someone finally told me, I was mortified! I never could look the cafeteria cashier in the face after that.
I think a good goal for those of us in HR is finding out the ‘unwritten rules’ in our offices and taking responsibility for communicating them to new hires.
Terese Bird says: Thank you so much for bringing this up. I notice the invisible rule problem a lot because I emigrated from the States to the UK. I’m sure I unwittingly operated under many invisible rules while living in the States, but emigrating to a new country really made me see the invisible rules. For example, in the UK city that I live in, everyone queues to get onto the city bus. However, in the same city, people do not queue to board a train. When I lived in a very large US city, no one queued for either. People just bunched up near the door, and were fairly polite, not pushing ahead of others, but not forming a queue either. So when I arrived here, I operated under my old US rules, and I must have looked very impolite before I realised I really should be queuing.. My very polite teenage daughter was also unaware of this invisible rule, and was actually followed to her seat on the bus by an indignant native who demanded an apology for not queuing, until she realised. We would all do well to be aware of and even to question our own and society’s invisible rules.
Maybe she wasn’t so much stunned by your question as exhausted from having to tell everyone where to put the bottle receipts over and over. I would so hang a sign after the first 10 minutes of that!
Another great post! Now you have me thinking about secret rules that I may have or encounter!. Thanks for the thought-provoking post.
[...] The Secret World Of Rules Being direct has its advantages, too. “There is a long list of invisible, but expected, [...]
I’ve had similar problems with lack of direction or instructions at those self service lanes. No directions that you can’t use coupons, it won’t take magazines, no alcohol, no marked down merchandise….with no signs that they can’t be done there. I understand the principle and business decision behind those lanes but without clear instructions they are more of a hinderance that an aid. Good lession for all organizaitons to think of.
Deirdre, This is a great thing to point out. Having been a rule-follower all my life, I know I dislike having that feeling of ‘breaking the rules’ when in fact I didn’t actually know the rule! At my old office, we had a large refrigerator in the cafeteria with milk/creamer for coffee and lots of juice and soft drinks. When I was given my office tour, someone pointed to the fridge and said “The stuff in there is free.” I thought she meant everything, so I frequently went to the fridge, and grabbed soft drinks or juice and left without paying. Turns out, only the milk/creamer were free…we were supposed to be paying for the juice or soft drinks. When someone finally told me, I was mortified! I never could look the cafeteria cashier in the face after that.
I think a good goal for those of us in HR is finding out the ‘unwritten rules’ in our offices and taking responsibility for communicating them to new hires.
Thank you so much for bringing this up. I notice the invisible rule problem a lot because I emigrated from the States to the UK. I’m sure I unwittingly operated under many invisible rules while living in the States, but emigrating to a new country really made me see the invisible rules. For example, in the UK city that I live in, everyone queues to get onto the city bus. However, in the same city, people do not queue to board a train. When I lived in a very large US city, no one queued for either. People just bunched up near the door, and were fairly polite, not pushing ahead of others, but not forming a queue either. So when I arrived here, I operated under my old US rules, and I must have looked very impolite before I realised I really should be queuing.. My very polite teenage daughter was also unaware of this invisible rule, and was actually followed to her seat on the bus by an indignant native who demanded an apology for not queuing, until she realised. We would all do well to be aware of and even to question our own and society’s invisible rules.
Maybe she wasn’t so much stunned by your question as exhausted from having to tell everyone where to put the bottle receipts over and over. I would so hang a sign after the first 10 minutes of that!
Another great post! Now you have me thinking about secret rules that I may have or encounter!. Thanks for the thought-provoking post.